When I hear the words "all-girl issue" I think bikinis. I think Brooke Burke rubbing sun tan lotion on Carmen Electra. I think school-girls in high white socks and plaid mini shirts. I think French maid outfits. So at the Tuesday morning content meeting two weeks ago when I heard the words "all-girl issue", I could not help but be very excited. I was so excited, in fact, that I forget to listen to the rest of what the issue was going to be about. At the end of the meeting, I was happy to be told that I wasn't given an article to do. You see, I am lazy. When I heard that girls were writing the articles, I became spaz happy. I imagined girls writing about how they kissed their first girl. Or how co-ed roommates have tickle fights in their panties. How they shower together to save water. I spent about a week straight with these thoughts as my companions. When I read the site the next Tuesday morning I was shocked almost sober. What the?!? Who in the hell would put women writers like this on the internet? We are not ground breakers here at Lowbrow. People don't want to read what girls write on the Internet. They want lesbians showering. They want Lowbrow wet T-shirt contests (I like that idea, to come some time in July). They want to see girls, not read what intelligent women have to say. Come on, people. Let's work together here.

When I came into that Tuesday's meeting, I let El Hombre and the girls have it. "Hey Genie-ass's, Sex Sells. What doesn't is dame writers. The only people that read what broads write are feminists and their numbers have dropped off a great deal since WWII and the death of their leader Hitler. We need to sex this site up and fast!" El Hombre's jaw dropped. He looked at me and then at the girls. He looked back at me.

So, I have to apologize to every one that visited the site looking for a real "all-girl issue". I did a search on all girl and to my delight I found want I was looking for, but the sites popped up on me and before I knew it I was overrun by adult pay sites that would keep popping up when I tried to close them. You know how it is, fellas, and if you ladies know how it is, I am single. I know, I know... it's hard to believe. If you're interested send your picture and a resume to my email.

Once again, I am sorry for the phoney all-girl issue. The Doctor is out.