Lowbrow Aristocrats Feature Departments

"Bring the questions to my domain, and I will make the answers reveal their secrets..."

Dear Kim,

My wife and I are planning to attend a country music concert. The problem is I hate country music! Should I keep my mouth shut and let her enjoy herself, or should I complain and let her know what a sacrifice I'm making?

-Country Hating in Calgary

Country Hating in Calgary!! Hello!!

Korea No. 1 Country!! We love dancing music! You should not hate Korea or our dance too much, it will be a heaviness in your heart and life and make your lady not be in love to you! She is must be very pretty lady to love dancing Korea Country so much!

August 15 is National Holiday called Liberation Day for Korea - it is joyful for all to look upon! For you and your pretty lady wife are welcome to Korea and have the groovy teenager dance party!! Famous band called "High Five of Teenager" is play all over for this time! You come and you will see not to hate the music!

You must not keep your mouth shut to talking, or you can not tell me how you love our happy dancing No 1 Country!!

Write to me soon!

These words and intents are from my tongue to your ear!

-Kim Li Fun

 

Dear Kim,

I'm an unattached male who owns a house with another unattached male. People are constantly making gay jokes about us. I don't think we really are gay. What should I do?

-Rocky in Regina

Rocky!! Hello!!!

For you and your pretty lady wife are welcome to Korea and have the groovy teenager dance party!!

The honor and privilege is mine within to speak on the internet of Rocky No. 1 Fighting Champ! You Knock 'Em Out on t-shirt literature! Korea loves to watch Rocky glisten as he fight to win victory upon his enemy!

Enough of this adoration love - your question is important to my heart and the answer lies here, with the boxing hands of playful kittens and no more!

To make the happy jokes on the smiles of two men who are without attachment only is to show the jealous meaning of whoever whispers these meanings in your lap.

Turn your backs to these wrongdoings, and have fun with your gay nature and joyful days!! Remember in your mind that to be gay is by its meaning to be happy and joyful and there should be no tears in such a thing!

But if you are the talk of another description of 'gay' in which the powerful man tool is the love of another man to receive, these decadent songs and actions that go against decency are not allowed here, and shame on The Champ for these to suckle!!

These words and intents are from my mouth to your lungs

-Kim Li Fun

 

Dear Kim,

What’s the matter with you?

-Jackson M., Portland OR

Portland!! Hello!!

My knees are hurt. You are careful to be asking. Are you AOK?

-Kim Li Fun

 

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